Think of Mario Cart.
There is no you and the Narcissist.
It is you VS the Narcissist.
The Narcissist must always be in 1st place and you last. If it looks like you are coming up close to the Narcissist by standing up to them or doing anything that involves being yourself, they will have a shell ready to throw at you knocking you back behind the Narcissist. A normal healthy couple should be travelling side by side together in their track but you are in the Narcissist’s driving track and according to the Narc you should always be in last place.
What if you let the Narc feel like they are in 1st place while you build a better track somewhere else on the side for your self?
The arrow in the 2nd pic is you! The head of your arrow is focused on building another track while the tale of your arrow is still in the Narcissist’s cycle leading them to believe that you are still in their cycle.
Do you believe that you could be in 1st place but in your own track?
The Narc doesn’t need to know any of this. They just need to know that you are still last place while you are on their track.
If you leave their track too soon without building a track for yourself then your mind will still be in alignment with the narc’s track pulling you back in.
Draw a track on a piece of paper in the figure of 8 and write down what could be in your track.